Bridesmaid Cancels $1,100 Bachelorette Party After Bridezilla Unexpectedly Kicks Her Out of Wedding Party

Author image for Isabella Penn
Isabella Penn
Dec 9, 2023 6:00 PM EST

Being asked to be in someone's wedding party is an honor. In many cases, it can even take your friendship to the next level as you realize how cool it is to be a part of someone's big day. But how would it feel to be in a wedding party, spend a fortune on the dress, travel expenses, etc., only to be kicked out of the group? It has to hurt pretty bad. These people are supposed to be your best friends. 

Well, this bridesmaid wasn't going to get walked all over by the bride. This woman is a total bridezilla, kicking women out of her wedding party left and right for no apparent reason. But she made the biggest mistake when she kicked out this OP, as she happened to be the only one who planned and paid for the bachelorette party. So now that she's not allowed to go, shouldn't she get her money back? That's what she and the rest of Reddit seem to think. Keep reading to see how the rest of this disaster played out. 

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  • 01
    Posted by u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320 12 hours ago 2 AITA for cancelling my best friend's bachelorette party after she "fired" me as a bridesmaid
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 02
    Gonna try and sum this up the most I can. I am a full-time student so I am currently living off student loans and what little hours I can work outside of school. I have spent around $1K on my best friend's wedding so far.
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 03
    ($350 on the bridesmaid's dress, $350 on the flight home to attend the wedding as I'm away for school, and about $100 on the gift I sent for her bridal shower).
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 04
    The MOH is currently very pregnant and having a rough time. She asked me to plan the bachelorette party. I agreed. I planned it perfectly and had it as a surprise. I messaged the other girls the plan. When they all
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 05
    agreed I went ahead and booked my idea. I spent (this is on top of the $1K I spent earlier) $400 on a limo to go bar hopping (the bride loves bar hopping) and I booked us a $700 AirBnB to crash in afterwards. As of
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 06
    right now the other bridesmaids did not chip in, this was out of pocket, but they said they would pay me back later. About a month later I and two other girls got kicked from the bridal party group chat along with a paragraph
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 07
    from the bride saying we were no longer invited because we weren't "honouring her wishes" When asked, she didn't answer what she meant or what we had done wrong. Two days pass and she adds us back to the chat and apologizes saying
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 08
    she's just stressed, we all talk about it and made up. Yesterday same thing happened except this time I'm the only one removed with a paragraph going off on me, telling me I'm not respecting her or her wishes, that she wishes she never
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 09
    invited me or asked me to be a bridesmaid. When asked what happened or what I did wrong, again radio silence. Today she messages me apologizing saying she's sorry for lashing out and that she'd like me there but not as a
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 10
    bridesmaid as it would make her "uncomfortable", and that I'm not allowed to wear the dress I had already bought as it's a bridesmaid's dress. I told her I respectfully declined as I couldn't afford another dress as I've already spent too much on this wedding and that I didn't
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 11
    want to make her uncomfortable on her big day. She then lashes out telling me I should just take more from my student loans to buy a second dress. So with that, I went and cancelled the Airbnb and the Limo. I told the other bridesmaids
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 12
    what had happened and they agreed it was fair. One of them must have told the bride about the secret bachelorette party as she messaged me telling me I'm an asole and I've ruined her entire wedding as
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 13
    she now doesn't have time to book a new bachelorette party in time and she nor any of the other bridesmaids have the money or savings to book anything. I also managed to get the refund for my
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 14
    flight so really I'm only out about $450 for a wedding I'm no longer invited to. AITA for cancelling the party and getting the money back?
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 15
    Tiny_Shelter440 · 11 hr. ago Aficionado [10] Something is missing here that kept you hanging in there in the first place. Has anyone ever told you what she meant by 'respecting her wishes' or her being 'uncomfortable'? When you 'all talked about it' the first time did anything make sense? Nevertheless NTA. Why is she comfortable spending your money on her party? Why are the others still comfortable being in her party? 5.7k Reply Share
    via u/Tiny_Shelter440
  • 16
    Firm_Tomatillo_6320 OP · 8 hr. ago Ah yes, I did not include this part, sorry! My bad. So the first time she messaged us, she didn't tell us nor explain what we were doing wrong. when we first all discussed it, she said she just had a moment of panic and stress took over, and she said things she didn't mean. The most recent time she had told me she'd be uncomfortable due
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 17
    to the fact we had a "fight" (the fight was her just removing me from the group chat and then cussing me out) she never told me what I wasn't respecting her wishes on unfortunately. But I will say she DID know she had a Bachelorette party, but the suprise was what it was going to be. I have spoke to MOH since this post and she has said that bride told her she just didn't know how she felt about a "skinny" girl next to her at the altar...
    via u/Firm_Tomatillo_6320
  • 18
    Environmental_Art591 · 8 hr. ago I have spoke to MOH since this post and she has said that bride told her she just didn't know how she felt about a "skinny" girl next to her at the altar... Maybe add this at the bottom. Oh and she isn't a friend she sees you as an ATM and accessory she can use at her convenience
    via u/Environmental_Art591
  • 19
    Prior_Blood_6293 11 hr. ago NTA. What I find funny though is that you planned and arranged the bachelorette party (which is basically only for the bride and her bridesmaids from what I know) (idk much so forgive me if I'm wrong on this) and then when she removed you as a bridesmaid you cancelled it(which you have every right to) and when she found out she went off at you and is calling you an as ole for not deciding to continue to fund her party which might I add you wouldn't even go to or parti
    via u/Prior_Blood_6293
  • 20
    Nervous_Routine_870 11 hr. ago Partassipant [1] ΝΤΑ So far, you have done the most work & had invested the most in the party (since they didn't pay you back). It seems like the bride is going back & forth with little respect for everything you've done. If you're no longer in the bridal party, and not even going to the wedding, you should get a refund for what you can. You should not be paying for something you're not even going to be at.
    via u/Nervous_Routine_870
  • 21
    vt2022cam 11 hr. ago Pooperintendant [54] . NTA - she's not your friend and she ruined her own wedding by mistreating people. Actions have consequences and she's learning what those are. You dodged a bullet. Looks like they all would have stuck you with the cost of the bachelorette party. Expecting you to use your loan money to help fund her wedding fun is terrible.
    via u/vt2022cam
  • 22
    Bridesmaid Maid of Phar
    via Caleb Oquendo

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friendship wedding party bridesmaids malicious compliance Crazy Brides bachelorette party petty revenge wedding reddit thread bridezilla Reddit Maid Of Honor couple
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